Put Me In Coach!

I’m not perfect.  And the good Lord knows …I’m not normal.  But the worst part of recovery from surgery is not being able to drive for a couple of weeks.  After one week of being the stressed out passenger and not the driver, I was begging the doctors to please let me drive.  If I don’t do anything else on this planet ..please let me operate a motor vehicle.  Let’s put it this way ..one more week of Bill’s driving would have been the end of my life as I now know it!  I would have either had a heart attack or I would have hired someone to put me out of my misery.   First thing…Bill almost stops to turn.  I wish I had a dollar for every time people honked at us.  I asked him if he gets this much attention every time he drives.  His response is like… what?  He doesn’t hear them honk!!!!  I keep imagining my poor jeep being sodomized by another car behind us.  The man sailed over speed bumps like we had “friggin” wings.  He said… they should have had them painted brighter.  Any brighter and it could have been a UFO landing pad!  There is an indention in the ragtop where I had to remove my cranium.  We nearly hit a gas pump.  Don’t ask!  And right before my plea to the medical board …we nearly side swiped a truck carrying live chickens to the rodeo.  An RV full of cluckers, a mobile egg laying union of pissed off hens in which Bill honks at and had feathers flying everywhere.  I had nightmares for days about my jeep covered in chicken poop.

In my opinion…mother nature has gone crazy.  We have cardinals, blue-jays, hawks, mockingbirds, chickadees, wrens, and sparrows all mating.  No concern about intimate privacy around here.  Daddy cardinal continues to amuse himself in the truck mirrors while daddy mockingbird is trying to mate with the den window.  The hawks, I think, like to do it while flying.  The others don’t give a crap about where or when.  It’s bad when you become an expert on birds sexual habits.  I need a real paying job!

You must play to know how much fun the game is.  You can’t warm the sideline or sit on the bench and watch.  You have to play the game.  It’s not ..oh no… I have cancer, I’ll sit this one out.  It’s OK, I have cancer and I’m going to play to win.  God wants you to play the game my friends.  Have fun with life…LIVE IT!  “Put me in coach, I’m ready to play, today.  Look at me, I can be center-field”. (words by John Fogerty)  If you have not heard this song…you need to.  A perfect example of the will to play and win.  Today I am going to have a hole-in-one, a touchdown, a home-run, ace it, take the winning lap, hit a 3 pointer, score a goal or beat the odds.

Lani has been gone nine days now.  It seems like forever.  I just can’t think about it.  Dusty returns from helping her move tomorrow.  Our friends Linda and David will be over on Wednesday… so Linda can help me with the final touches of the new book.  It will then go to Tyler for editing.  So get ready for “They’re Pistols and They’re Loaded”.  Real excited about this one and hope you will all enjoy reading it as much as Lani and I enjoyed writing it. 

So…put me in God…I’m playing today!


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